My beautiful listeners, you know I love having big talks with our guests, but now it's my
I have a big question for you this week.
It's something that's a big part of my life, so I thought I'd share it with you.
The big question is, do opposites attract?
Do opposites make for a long-term relationship?
We know short-term, yeah, there might be a little bit of, is the word, frisson, and
a bit of, you know, energy, tension, that can be good.
But does that translate into a successful, long-term, happy relationship?
Well, my answer is yes, yes it does, with a capital Y, and why is because of my darling
husband, Petey, you cannot get two more different people.
We've been married for 17 years, we have been together for 20 years.
Now we couldn't be more different.
The older I get, the more eccentric I get.
Petey is sort of the same, in the sense of, I like to wear outlandish clothes, I always
have, but probably as I get older I get a little more crazy in my outfit choices, whereas
my darling Petey is still wearing the same brown RM Williams boots, his polo shirt with
the collar turned up, and jeans, and he's still wearing that out we go for dinner or
for lunch, and he'll look at me and he'll be like, Pussycat, where are you going?
And I'll say, the same place as you, as he wears the same outfit, he rolls his eyes,
we have a laugh, and off we go.
We are different, perfect example.
When we first met, well we first met actually a bazillion years ago when I was doing work
experience and Petey was the sports reporter, I was wearing overalls, he was in his suit,
and we sort of went our different ways, but I thought, what a lovely, lovely man.
We re-met many years later at the Logies, and he was charming, he got me a champagne,
and I remember thinking, why can't I date a lovely man like this, a good, decent man?
So a few months later I was single, and I thought, now is my chance, I have never been
backward in coming forward, I have always asked blokes out, I think you've got nothing
to lose, what is the worst they can say?
So I rang Petey and he said yes, and we went out on a date, we had a lovely night, he headed
off on an overseas trip, and he said to me, okay, I'll ring you when I come back.
How many times have we heard that, listeners?
The guy saying, yep, you'll hear from me and you'll never hear from them again.
But Petey rang me.
He rang me two weeks later, it was my birthday weekend, and he said, well what are you doing
Well, I'm going out on a birthday dinner with my family and all my friends.
And Petey went, oh, I'd love to come with you, hello, how many people who've only just
met someone agree to go to dinner with this person's family and all of their friends?
I thought, now this is a good sign.
What was an even better sign was when Petey came to pick me up, I was dressed as a mermaid,
and I had this wonderful blue sparkly dress, it was glittering in sequins, I had electric
blue eyeshadow, massive false eyelashes, and my hair was standing up on end like I'd put
my finger into an electric socket.
It was a very cool look at the time.
And there is my darling Petey.
I opened the door and he was wearing the pink polo shirt, collar up, Aaron Williams boots
and jeans, and he looked a little agog.
He was like, oh, oh, you look breathtaking.
And then I think he said, you take my breath away, because I think he didn't really quite
know what to say.
He was so shocked by who is this crazy woman with the hair and all the makeup.
Because before that, Petey's style was very much not to disparage people who wear loafers,
but he liked the velvet Alice headband, blonde bob, pearls around the neck and loafer shoes.
But we had such a happy night.
And you know, our relationship took time to develop.
And over this time, it was a couple of years that we were together before Petey asked me
And do you know, me saying yes to Petey, it is the best decision I have made in my life.
And why it's the best decision is even though we are so different, he is my rock.
Petey brings me back to earth when I start to get too light and sort of float away.
And I lighten Petey when he gets too serious and too caught up in the minutia.
So we balance one another out.
I also know that because Petey loves me for who I am, my craziness and everything, he
allows me to be me.
So I have the confidence to embrace the crazy parts of my personality.
I have the confidence to say yes to left of field ideas, to give things a crack.
If he wasn't there by my side, I don't think I would be as keen to walk out onto that
tightrope because I know if I fall, he is there to catch me.
And I also know too that Petey wouldn't be able to do what he does every day if I wasn't
there by his side cheering him on, reassuring him.
So we are an incredible team.
And I think what the key is as well is we are different in so many ways.
But it's really the way that we are different is almost in the window dressing.
It's the exterior stuff.
It's the stuff that doesn't matter.
Where we are the same is our moral compass.
What we share is that we both believe wholeheartedly in what matters.
What matters to Petey most also matters to me most.
What matters to us most is love.
What matters to us most is our family, is integrity, is decency and kindness.
And because neither of us waver on those big ticket items, we can be different in our other
ways because that stuff doesn't really matter and we can sort of laugh off those differences.
Okay, so what are our differences?
You know I'm a craphousewife.
I have no problems with having piles of crap everywhere.
Petey doesn't like mess.
He is much tidier and much more organised than I am.
He is so organised, I'm far more chaotic.
I could live in my car.
I have all sorts of different outfit changes.
I've got plenty of food snacks.
I've got plenty of water.
I've got lots of lipstick, anything you need.
I've got costumes.
I've even got a cat head in my car that I love.
Petey's car is neat.
Whenever he gets in my car, he gets very cross as he tries to put his RM Williams boot around
the chicken McNugget packet that's on the floor that probably still has a few chicken
Even though he only wears his tie at work, he will never leave the house looking dishevelled.
I have no problems leaving the house looking dishevelled.
I frequently wear my dressing gown and jammies and my Bart Simpson style hair straight out
of bed to drop the girls to school and Petey's like, pussycat, you can't do that.
And I'm like, well, why not?
Something might happen.
And I said, well, what's going to happen?
And he said, well, if something happens, the last thing anyone is going to be worried about
is me and my dressing gown.
I mean, who cares?
But then he's like, but you're not wearing shoes.
And I said, that doesn't matter.
The other thing that drives me up the wall is driving.
I'm a very slow, cautious driver.
I don't drive fast.
Even my daughters will say, mum, can you go a bit faster?
This is the speed.
And Petey will frequently, if we're driving to the same place, Petey will always beat me there.
Petey is also very particular about scrapes on the side of my car.
It doesn't bother me.
I sometimes have issues with kerbs that jump out or reverse parking.
It doesn't bother me.
I could just have that forever.
Petey says we have a frequent flyer program at our panel beta, thanks to me.
Petey's wheel's very shiny.
Everything's very shiny.
We are all so different when it comes to moving.
We moved house recently.
I was calm in the sense of I knew we'd get there.
But you know what?
I say that because I know it will happen because Petey's going to be the one to organise it.
He's going to be the one to ring the removal truck.
Petey is good at the detail.
I'm better at big picture and the song and dance act.
I'm hopeless at returning people's phone calls.
It doesn't mean I don't love you if you don't hear from me.
I've just got busy and I've forgotten.
Petey has to return everyone's phone call.
It doesn't matter who it is, when they're ringing, Petey has to pick up a phone that is ringing.
I've even been known frequently not to answer when Petey rings me because I'm thinking I'm busy.
And then he'll get cross.
He'll send me text messages saying, I know you're on Instagram.
People at work have told me you're tweeting or you're doing this.
But then the problem is I then get even more stubborn and think, no, I'm not going to answer the phone.
So he then has to keep ringing and then he'll ring places where I am.
I've been in cafes and Petey's rung the person at the cafe.
Or when I used to work at Channel 10, he knew the woman on the reception very well.
And he'd ring her because he'd say, I know that Jess is at work.
Please put me through to her.
So we're very different that way.
Another thing where we are different is when we travel, Petey likes to he likes to get up early.
He likes to have all the suitcases at the front door.
He likes to be in charge of the passports.
And I'd like to say, why can't I hold my passport?
I've held my passport for many years before I met you.
No, no, I'm in charge of all the passports.
He also has to put all the bags on the luggage thing.
No one else can lift the bags or stick the name tags on.
And he has to fill out all of the, you know, the different forms and always be the one front in the line.
I mean, I tease him with that, but you know what?
Couldn't do any of it without him.
Even though the one thing really I wish Petey would change is he likes to talk the minute he wakes up in the morning.
You know, I like to talk, but I cannot talk the minute I open my eyes.
But Petey's eyes are open and he's telling me, OK, pussycat, now you know that you've got to do this and have you run back this person.
And then I'm going to go and be doing this and then I'm playing tennis.
And then, do you know, next Thursday, then we've got to organise this.
And then in a month's time, then this is coming up.
And I'm like, I haven't opened my eyes.
I haven't had my litre of coffee, please.
So, dear listeners, that's a handful of ways where we are different.
But do you know what?
I really wouldn't want to do life any other way.